She is a researcher, a storyteller, and a vulnerability expert. I know her as a game changer, a life changer, and one of the most insightful voices speaking to creators today. Brené Brown has completely re-framed the conversation around the emotions that define our creative lives: courage, vulnerability, shame, and empathy. Her work provides a toolkit for anyone who has ever had a wild idea and the courage to share it with the world.
Brené is a research professor at the University of Houston, but millions of us first met her through her now-legendary 2010 TEDx Houston talk, “The Power of Vulnerability.” That talk exploded, becoming one of the most-viewed TED talks in history and launching a global conversation. She has since authored multiple number-one New York Times bestsellers, including The Gifts of Imperfection, Daring Greatly, and the book we dove into on my show, Rising Strong. Her work is not based on opinion; it is built on more than two decades of rigorous research into the experiences that bring meaning to our lives.
I have been so fortunate to sit down with Brené for one of my all-time favorite episodes of Chase Jarvis LIVE. We spent nearly two hours breaking down the core ideas from Rising Strong and what they mean for us as creatives. It was an incredible conversation that I find myself returning to again and again. You can find that full interview on CreativeLive, and I can’t recommend it enough. For Brené, creatives are the experts in getting back up, because our job requires us to “walk into the dark every day” and share our work, facing both helpful feedback and hurtful criticism.
Brené’s work is packed with actionable ideas that feel like they were designed specifically for those of us in the arena, putting our work and ourselves on the line. Here are a few of the most powerful concepts you can start applying to your own creative process today.
1. The Story I’m Making Up
When we face a setback—a harsh critique, a project rejection, or even just a weird look from a colleague—our brains are wired to create a story to make sense of it. Fast. The problem is, this first story is usually a “conspiracy,” as Brené calls it, a narrative filled in with our deepest fears. The most powerful thing you can do is pause and recognize this internal fiction.
- Recognize the Emotion. The first step is simply noticing the physiological shift in your body. Is your heart racing? Do you have tunnel vision? Acknowledge that you have been snagged by an emotion.
- Say the Magic Words. Use the phrase, “The story I’m making up right now is…” This simple act separates you from the story and transforms it from fact into a narrative you can examine.
- Get Curious. Ask yourself three questions: What do I know for sure? What parts am I filling in with fear or assumption? And what do I need to know to have the full picture?
- Check In. If it involves another person, have the courage to check the story with them. A simple, “Hey, when you said X, the story I made up was Y. Can we talk about that?” can prevent a world of misunderstanding and resentment.
2. Get in the Arena
This idea, inspired by a Theodore Roosevelt quote, is the foundation of Daring Greatly. The arena is wherever you are taking a risk, showing your work, and being vulnerable. The world is full of critics in the “cheap seats” who will never be brave enough to step into the ring themselves. Your job is to tune them out and focus on the opinions of those who are in there with you.
- Make Your List. Write down the names of the people whose opinions truly matter to you. These are the people who love you not despite your vulnerability, but because of it. Keep this list small.
- Consult the List. When you receive harsh criticism, look at your list. If the person dishing it out is not on that list, you do not need to take their feedback to heart.
- Embrace Failure. As Brené says, “If you’re brave enough, often enough, you’re going to fall.” Failure is not a risk in the arena; it is a guarantee. See it not as a judgment of your worth, but as proof that you are being brave with your life and your work.
3. Reckon, Rumble, Revolution
This is the three-part process for getting back up after a fall, outlined in Rising Strong. It is not easy, but it is the path back to a place of courage and creativity. It is the framework for turning a face-plant into fuel for your next brave act.
- Reckon with Your Emotions. Instead of offloading your feelings (by numbing, blaming, or lashing out), get curious about them. What are you really feeling? We often default to “happy, sad, and pissed off,” but getting specific is a superpower. Are you feeling disappointment, shame, grief, or envy?
- Rumble with Your Story. This is where you challenge that first “shitty first draft” you told yourself. You question the conspiracies and assumptions. You dig in and get honest about what happened, what role you played, and what you need to learn.
- Live the Revolution. The final step is writing a new, more courageous ending to your story. You take the learnings from your rumble and integrate them into how you live, love, and work. This is how a fall makes you braver, not smaller.
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